medicinemom
on 04.29.2020

What a vast difference there is between the mental/spiritual place I am in now, regarding cannabis, as opposed to that time many years ago when I was the regional grower/supplier in the day when “sinsemilla” was first beginning to be a thing.

At that time, I was just having fun and supplying others with the same. Unconsciously, I was also using the high to medicate the pain of a very dysfunctional marriage. As I began to have children, I was convicted to stop using cannabis so that I could focus on my babies’ lives and offer them some kind of stability. Shortly after that, I became a christian and felt that keeping cannabis out of my life was beneficial. However, God never told me to abandon cannabis – I just assumed that was part of being a christian.

Fast forward to about 7 years ago. Very long story short, I had come out of a religious cult and was clinically depressed. I was also advancing in my years and had developed a number of health issues that prevented me from being able to work full time. I did do a little secretary-ing for a friend and he reluctantly allowed me to know of his cannabis use. I was intrigued. Had not even thought of cannabis in many years. I tried what he had and almost immediately regretted it. The potency was off the charts and I spent about two hours just trying to calm myself and breathe deeply enough to avoid a panic attack.

After that, I thought I would never try it again. But, more and more articles were coming out about the medicinal benefits of cannabis and I really needed something to help with the pain of my afflictions. I started educating myself on present-day aspects of this herb and as I did so, I felt like I had wandered into a whole new universe of cannabis understanding.

My experience with God, from the time of becoming a christian, had been one of intimacy on many levels and I really appreciated the way He would break through my old ways of thinking, seeing and feeling about things. He never told me that cannabis was evil or to avoid it. There is no box the shape of God. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures.

I began to experiment with different strains and methods of consumption in order to find what worked for me. I had a variety of experiences – some pleasant and some, not so much – but through it all, I felt that this medicine from God was helping me in ways I really could not completely articulate.

My natural man needs the calming of the green medicine. My christian soul appreciates how it softens of the sounds of the rude world. The spirit of God within me is nurtured by the slowing down element of cannabis, tuning my heart to the only Voice that matters. Might it be possible that Revelation 22:2 is referring to this healing medicine? What I know for certain is that God gives many and mysterious gifts that need to be examined fully in order to appreciate what He has done.

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